Faith

Or so thats the theme of the speechlite camp... heh heh

Ya i didnt really slp when i came back from camp lah. lol. Ended up playing x-box. But thats not the point....

Anyway im very thankful for the camp!! Considering how much resistance i had towards it... this camp is very good alr. I didn't want to expect much from this camp, but my expectations were met, goes to show His faithfulness =)

[random column] I actually prayed for my team members during ministry time. Its my firz time acting in the position of the leader lah. I'm always on the other end haha. I felt really privilliged to b able to do that, haha =). And im a quiet guy, get over it, i can talk random rubbish smtimes, but im a introverted guy. 89% introverted according to DISC. Ya so dun expected me act ra-ra suddenly, i have already opened up, u dun have to ask me to again, becuz our definition of that is different. Ok i admit the previous camp i didnt really open up lol. [/random column]

The camp was over 4 days, will be quite boring to go thru day by day lol. Think this camp sets me back on the rite track again. at least it can be a start haha. U noe being in the power group and observing their conviction really get me going, thanks to the group!
Ok lah i learnt alot, but it will be pointless to put it down in words only. I would rather apply it, and that will take time. So therefore i wont say what i learnt becuz i havent "learnt" it yet :)

In this camp i heard very "inspiring" phrases. You noe, like getting the enlightened moment (or revelation ) when some1 said smthin. Your mind goes wha... and 10000 lightbulbs lighted up around ur head kinda thing. Yup so i shall share them here......

1. "Repent of not loving Him the way we should"

Heard this on the firz day, in regards to rev 2:4. losing our firz love.....
You noe, when people talk about repentence, they talk about repenting their wrong ways, all the things they should not do, all the things they did not do, blah blah. But no1 ever talked about repenting for not loving Him, ok i couldn't get over this phrase. It didn't occur to me that was the problem, i always thought by repenting of all our wrongdoings we will get back our firz love, n i always knew smthing was missing there, like a missing step. Imagine if we repented of everything but not loving Him, we will juz end up going in circles. Becuz without that kind of love nothing changes, nothing.

2. "Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bonds of peace. -Eph 4:3 "

Ya i heard that during the ministry workshop. The keyword is keep. That blew me away haha. Basically wad it says, in regards to ministry, we r to keep the unity. Again, we r supposed to keep wad He was given us, to use it for Him. Thats all. Ya that is all, keep and thats it. Haha really, thats all we can do. Its all given by Him, we do nothing to "add" to it. Ya something like what Mace Windu said in star wars (ya lol random stuff like that come to my mind haha) "We are keepers of the peace, not soldiers. " in regards to the role of jedi knights in the republic. Jedi knights aren't supposed to fite in the war, as in they r not a fighting unit. True that they can wield lightsabers and look almost imba in combat, but u dun c Yoda gathering all His jedi knights and then going to war unlike the spartans in 300. (Haha thats the best parallel i can think of, both r very good at fighting, but they act differently.) And they like to talk about maintaining the order of the force lol, they dun talk about killing off the invaders...
Similarly, we r to keep this unity, thats our role in ministry. When we come together to serve Him and His people, we r simply maintaining wad He has blessed every1 with. All the fighting is not done by us, He is doing it for us. Too often we hold ourselves responsible for the fighting, and in doing so we start to lose wad He has in store. And ultimately He is in charge, becuz its His to begin with :) Of cuz this is not an excuse to slack off, notice the words "Make every effort" before it, this shows a kind of trying really hard and yet leaving it all in His hands at the same time, something that requires faith =)

3. I cant rmb the exact words. i shall try to phrase it.
" Becuz of the kind of God's love that the leaders have shown me, i begin to start to love myself, and in doing so, start loving God "

wow, that totally sums up wad i went thru. I did not said that, n i certainly dunnoe how to phrase it. On firz look this phrase looks abit flawed and selfish, so i shall attempt to explain it. Ahh will be much clearer if i tell story instead hahaha.

Fine. i used to hate myself, in a way. I hated many things in my life. Anyway, i couldn't understand His love, i couldn't even love, i refused to know wad it is. So i had this cell leader that tried to showed that kind of love to me, and nothing happened. Ya still nothing happened, i still hate myself lol. There was no bright light, no sudden desire or anything. But after some time, i begin to question if it is still worth it hating myself, y m i doing this when there is still love ard. Thats when i begin to start to love myself. It didn't occur overnite, a really long time i might add, that by the time i learnt it, my leader has long left. Basically i begin to value my own life, i didn't want to waste it becuz that will will be wasting all the effort my leader and many others has put in, i thought i was being very unfair to them if i still continue hating me. And so i began my journey to love myself, and without me hating myself, God can then begin working in me. The rest, they say, is history :)
Therefore it is very impt for leaders to start showing love firz, if not the members will nv be able to understand wad His love is no matter how much u tell them.

Took me about one and a half hours to type this lah. I thought i will be done in 15 lol. Thats is all have a nice day!

[ I walk by faith, each step by faith. ]